Ask Agent Carolina

ask-agent-california-huntingdon:

Hunt shook her head. “For you maybe.” She hadn’t meant her statement to sound so bitter, but her grief right now was raw. “My family was destroyed years ago and my home was turned to glass. My family is here. This is all I have left. And yet every step I take just sees more of them dead.”

“Your family is Hawaii! And Dakota! And unless you want your daughter growing up in a war zone - on the frigate of a secret project where she’d be alone and isolated all the time, I’d think you want to make a new home! For her! You’re a damn soldier, Hunt, and I’d thought a good one. If you can’t fight for yourself, fight for her!”

She paced angrily around her small room, “Just for the love of all that is holy, don’t just sit there and give up!”

ask-agent-california-huntingdon:

As Carolina delivered her answer, Hunt was certain that she could also hear her unspoken one underneath it all. She let out a defeated sigh.

“They didn’t deserve it.” She finally just spoke in a quiet voice. “Ally didn’t deserve what she got, and Rhode didn’t deserve to die, either. She was going to leave - was supposed to leave - and be happy. Escape this bitter war. She was supposed to live.”

All too suddenly, grief and anger threatened to take over her. Hunt clenched her fists. “Rhode was supposed to live!” A spark blazed in her eyes, even her handicapped one. “And she would but I was…” She cut herself short, lowering her voice again. “I was… scared, damn it, I was scared. Scared of what would happen to me if I disobeyed. To Dakota. I didn’t want to do it. I didn’t want this. I didn’t sign up for this!”

“None of us signed up for this.” Lina spoke quietly, not looking at Hunt, but down at the floor. “We signed up to be heroes, to fight the good fight, to take back what was ours.”

She looked sharply up at Hunt, ferocity in her eyes. 

“But that’s a damn lie. There is no “good fight”, there are no perfect heroes. We signed up for a war - a bloody, awful war. We aren’t heroes and we may never be. Our hands will always be stained red with blood, and that’s something we have to live with. But that doesn’t mean what we’re doing is wrong. Every step brings us closer to the end of this damn war, closer to our families and our homes and everything we left behind. 

Screw being scared. Walk forward. Jog, run, sprint, I don’t care. Each step brings you closer to home.”

ask-agent-california-huntingdon:

“You think I can rest after all this? I barely get enough sleep as it is after all I’ve witnessed.” Her tone was a mixture of feelings; sorrow, anger, regret… “I mean… Imagine if the Director ordered you to kill York and you felt like you had no choice but to carry out that order. How would you feel, Carolina? Would you be able to rest after that?”

‘Lina flinched, obviously disturbed by the thought. York would never- He wouldn’t- But again she remembered the incident with the lock. He’d almost left… But almost leaving and betraying everyone were two different things. Two very different things. She sighed shakily, this whole business was terrible, and she wanted nothing more than to move past it as quickly as possible.

“If York- If he ever… If he did what Rhode did… He wouldn’t be the man I love now. He’d be a stranger.”

She gulped and continued hesitantly:

“And I’ve killed lots of strangers.”

Really though, that was a lie too. The shaking in her hands told her she could never hurt York, no matter he did or didn’t do.

Me attempting to write RvB fanfics:

reeberry:

soldiertex:

I’m going to go ahead and say, again, I think every writer feels like this. I know I do! So don’t worry: I guarantee that your fics are much, much better than you think they are! (We are all our own worst critics.)

G’night folks

ask-agent-california-huntingdon:

“That’s… that’s not what happened.” Hunt began to stumble over her words again she recalled that fateful day. “She got into an argument… with agent Texas… down in the armoury and she…” She faltered again.

“Dallas, would you like me to continue for you?” Darrow asked, concerned for his host.

“No, no…” Hunt shook her head. “Texas… she killed Ally. I was there… I confronted her… she nearly killed me too. Threatened to kill my daughter…” She put her head in her hands. “Oh god…”

Carolina paled a bit. That wasn’t possible. It just, wasn’t.

“Hunt, what you’re saying… No that’s just not possible. Agent Texas is an agent in those program just as much as you or I. She wouldn’t kill a fellow agent, because of some argument. And the Director? There’s no way he’d allow that, even with Texas being -” Carolina bit her lip but continued “Even with Texas being first. He’s not going to allow senseless murder.”

Carolina looked down and shook her head and half mumbled to herself.

“It’s just, not possible.”